When setting goals, it is important to state them positively and to be as explicit as possible. This is significant because our minds are direction-oriented and we often get what we focus on. For example, if your goal is to have steady, controlled hands while playing your instrument, there’s no point in constantly saying, “I don’t want shaky hands while playing” as you are focussing on the shaking rather than the steadiness.

The alternative would be to say, “I want to have steady, controlled hands while playing my bass” and then more specifically, “I want to have steady, controlled hands while playing my bass every time I perform ‘Mustang Sally’”. You may take it further and be even more detailed, “I want to have steady, controlled hands while playing my 5 string bass every time I perform ‘Mustang Sally’ as the opening act”.

Once your goal is honest and clear, you need to make it compelling enough to be acted upon, otherwise it’s just another list that is a small representation of your goals and desires. It’s not so much about ticking things off the list as you go along, as much as it is about the things on the list making you tick. So to make your goal compelling, you need to engage your senses (feeling, hearing, seeing). Let’s go back to the earlier example of playing with steady, controlled hands. When you do play your bass with steady hands, what will you feel, hear or see? How will your hands feel sliding smoothly over your fret board? Can you see yourself controlling the movement of your hands? What tone do you hear from your bass? How will you know when you’ve achieved your goal? Imagine these things and make your goal come alive!

Many performers know that they want to improve some aspect of their performance, but when asked the question, “what is your ideal performance?”, so many of them are unsure. What is ‘right’ for one person may be ‘wrong’ for another, so what constitutes an ideal performance resides with the performer or individual. Knowing what you want is the first step in creating your ideal performance…

Read full article here…

One of the main causes of stress is fear, often spurred on by worry. When you experience fear, the natural response is either ‘flight or fight’. In other words when you feel fear you either want to run away from what you are fearful of or fight against it. For example, you are worried about your financial situation. You are probably fearful of the repercussions of what your situation might bring (unpaid bills, material loss etc).

The ‘flight’ in this situation could be ignoring the reality of what you are experiencing and not facing the issue. The ‘fight’ can refer to your fretting or your complaining about your finances without seeking solutions. The recurring thoughts about this situation stir your feelings of fear which in turn have negative effects on you both mentally and physically. Let’s take a closer look at some of these effects.

If you are constantly worrying about your situation, your mind becomes contaminated by negative thoughts and uses a lot of your energy. This usually worsens your perception about the issue making it harder to find a solution and affecting your mood and emotions as well .

The physical effects are greatly influenced by the mental aspects. Fear produces adrenaline, which causes your blood vessels to constrict, increasing your blood pressure and preparing you for the ‘flight or fight’ syndrome. This physical reaction occurs anytime you feel fear and it can cause anxiety, which later results in lethargy unless a solution is found.

Now that we have examined some of the main cause of stress and some of the effects it can have on you, let’s look at the solution.

Stop worrying – be conscious of your thoughts and change them. Anytime you have a negative thought, replace it with an empowering and inspiring one. This enables you to reduce the fear and lessen the negative effects. How can you change your thoughts? By changing the pictures in your head, altering the sounds and inner voices, or by changing the feelings in your body.

Thankfulness – do you wake up every morning? Can you breathe? Do you have a roof over your head? Show gratitude for the things that you have in your life. You will always have challenges, and by being thankful for the little things, you can shrink the magnitude of your difficult experiences.

Relax – make relaxation a habit. This is the opposite of worry and it also has the opposite effect on your mental and physical health. Choose things that allow you to totally let go, whether it’s a long bath, a meditation class, a good book or a weekend away.

Energise yourself – it is also important to source energy, especially since you’ll need it after all the anxiety and lethargy that stress can cause. Revitalise your mind, body and spirit by eating the best foods and thinking the best thoughts.

Start living – don’t exist and float around your problems, face them with positive conviction! Live your life to the fullest. Make compelling and fruitful goals – short term and long term. Be passionate and courageous and adopt a ‘go get it’ attitude.

Success is yours – once you follow the first 5 steps, success is assured! When you are no longer worrying, you feel grateful, you are relaxed, have energy and you can start truly living your life. You then give yourself the opportunity to move forward and find solutions to all of the challenges that come your way. Like all things, the more you practise the easier it becomes. All that is left is for you to enjoy your success!

~ END

Have you ever wondered how a whole day could go by and you didn’t spend one minute of it on yourself? Then one day becomes one week, one week becomes one month, one month becomes one year…you know where I’m going with this. How do you stop the cycle of putting everything and everyone before yourself? It’s simple, make you the priority! What do you have at the top of your list? Work? Family? Friends? These are extremely important, giving them some measure of priority is therefore understood. Bearing this in mind, you must ask yourself, ‘what kind of mother/father would I be if I’m tired all of the time?’ Will I be as creative or fulfilled at work as I can be, if I don’t nurture myself outside of this environment? ‘Will I have time for a social life if I spend my time looking after everyone else?’ Not likely, so let’s look at a solution.

What I want you to focus on are those moments when you might want to make time for yourself, but find a reason not to. With this is in mind, I now want you to imagine yourself taking the time and leaving those reasons behind. Do you not think this latter experience is better? Hopefully you have answered yes, but if not here is the possible reason why.

The most common reason for someone feeling badly about taking some time out for him/herself, is that he/she deems this act to be ‘selfish’. ‘Selfish’ isn’t always a bad thing.

Think about when you’re on an aeroplane and you are instructed to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others. This act may seem ‘selfish’ at first, but it gives others a better chance of survival if you are in a strong enough position to help. Similarly, you can be strong enough to be there to support others, if you look after yourself first.

So if you’re ready to make some changes and give yourself some much deserved time, follow the tips below:

• Plan your day the night before – this way you can schedule some time for yourself during the part of the day which would work best for you. This can be as little as 10 minutes or as long as you can/want to take.

• Say ‘NO’ to anyone (even yourself) who tries to fill that pre-scheduled time with something else (unless there’s an emergency of course).

• Do something you really want to do and not what you think you should do.

• Switch off (from anything unrelated) so that you can thoroughly enjoy these moments and allow yourself to benefit truly from the experience.

At the end of each of these moments, remember what you’re giving yourself – a time to relax, energise, release stress, be free and just simply ‘be’.

Like all things, the more you practise something, the better you get at doing it. So I would like to suggest that when you take a few moments each day for one week,  then reward yourself! You deserve it.